Well, it is obvious the enemy is mad that I am fasting and praying. He has sent every fiery dart imaginable my way today. He never plays fair and he certainly doesn’t give you a chance to catch your breath. But God has been with me every step of the way. I may not have felt like it but I know The Truth. If I haven’t felt God with me it isn’t because He has left me, and for today I don’t even think that I left Him. I just didn’t press in close enough.
Don’t you hate it when you know what to tell everyone else but when it comes to you putting it into practice you fail miserably? It’s been that sort of day. Tomorrow will NOT be that kind of day. I am ready for his tricks and I am ready to pray. The enemy knows if he can throw us off balance for even a second then he can take the lead.
All it takes is one wrong memory, one wrong feeling or emotion, one wrong thought and the downward spiral begins. If I were talking to a friend or my class I would have all sorts of great advice, but I don’t have any for myself. This happens more often than I care to admit. But like I said, God has been with me today. He is my ever present help in times of trouble. He has played just the right song, just the right preacher, given me just the right verse and even the right devotional. So why did I choose to not live in Victory today? It is like saying God is not big enough or Jesus’ Blood wasn’t enough for me and my sin. This is nothing more than self centered. Ouch.
I don’t like it when I don’t rest, when I don’t choose to be still and know that He is God. He can take it, He can take it all. Every fiery dart should be laughed at because I know God takes them for me. Yet I choose to let them burn a bit, sometimes a few can even start a flame. And then in His goodness God comes to put out the fire like He always does. The problem lies with me. I tried to put the fire out myself. There’s that old self again.
One thing good from today is that I know some of my prayer assignments during this fast. No wonder the enemy is angry. Well, as Scarlet O’Hara would say, “tomorrow is another day” and I am so thankful it is.
“Father, wake me up in the morning with You on my mind. You take my mind and make it new. There is work to do and you and I both know I can’t do it. Revive me with Your Spirit, breath on me, fill me and make me useful for Your Kingdom. Pray Your prayers through me Lord Jesus. Empty me of me and use me for Your Kingdom. I cast this day on You, and thank You that tomorrow will be better. In Jesus Name, Amen.”
